I glanced some Steve Harvey this morning, and heres the tl;dw version
A woman lives with her boyfriend.
They both agree not to have sex until marriage.
After 2 years, the boyfriend is not ready to marry her, he wants 2 more years.
Presumably sex free as well.
The girl wants to get married because
-Her family all had long courting periods before marriage
-(implied) wishes for sex
(implied) both of them have had sex with partners before, and it failed
and that got me thinking which is better, fuck or fuck free?
Let us talk about 2 people, who have never had sex before but would like to.
I have mentioned this before, and I am still envious of my former room mate who saved himself for his wife, and I hope they are the first, last and only ones to fuck each other.
What if he is bad at sex? I am really not worried about it. I've seen how much heat is packing (he liked running around the room naked) He is going to be fine.
It worked very, very well in that case because both parties did not know what they were missing and the excitement over the sex was not greater than the excitement about spending their lives together.
If they did not get married this is still an ideal situation, it is an excellent opportunity for both parties to get to know what each other likes and what they like free from expectations.
I wish I did it that way...
How about when one person wants sex, the other does not.
In this case, both parties have had sex with previous partners. Like the example above
I have been here before and let me tell you, it sucks. This is what I would like to call sexual incompatibility. Generally in this case, the person who does not want the sex either is still in love with their previous partner and/or the last sex they had was awful.
Huge expectations for both people, and generally it leads to passionless, awful sex or no sex at all. Either way, everyone ends up miserable.
Same situation as above, except one person has not had sex before.
This is even fucking worse. If the virgin wants the sex they will not get an adequate fucking because the person with the experience is incapable of giving out a good fuck.
If the virgin does not want the sex, what it creates is alot of sexual tension which at some point will break. However if they decide to stay a virgin for some misplaced religious beliefs the other party will give up and go after another target because frankly fuck that shit.
I have been there before
If the not so virgin sticks it out until the tension breaks they will be rewarded with mind blowing sex and most likely an eventual failed relationship
I have also been there before.
You know, its not the 60's anymore guys. People will not judge you negatively for having sex before marriage.
I have seen a couple of types of virgins, basically you have 2 types - stubborn and horny. The horny ones will give in the stubborn ones are likely moderately to extremely religious/spiritual.
I have also made this point before - what makes us masters of this planet, what differentiates us from the apes is WE DO NOT NEED TO GIVE INTO OUR INSTINCTS.
If a beast is hungry, it eats. If it needs to shit, it shits, if it needs to fuck it fucks.
Until it is necessary for our survival, we do not need to indulge those instincts. If you are thirst you dont need to drink, however after a day or 2 you will need to.
The strongest of these instincts is sex, heres the problem its needed to continue the existence of our species and it feels good.
Why do you think sex feels good? Its an evolutionary trait because humans became smart enough to overcome its instincts, they could become smart enough to not want to fuck which means the species as a whole could die.
Point being: there is no shame in giving into your instincts, they are probably telling you something that you probably need to do in the near-ish future in order to not die.
This obsession with a lack of obsession with sex is pretty much as bad as an obsession with sex. The sex isnt sacred, the relationship you form with the partner is. The marriage isnt important, the family you make from it is.
I feel that certain men have pushed a certain agenda with the church. I suspect they though they were doing what was best for people, but it taught people not to think, challenge and ultimately put the emphasis on the wrong thing.
So, that woman at the start. No sex until marriage, but you live with your boyfriend, you kiss, you tease and you play (probably). You have done more damage to your relationship than good, you should not have lived together if you were going to play that game, and you have put a lot of importance on sex, and not making love, you have put alot of importance on a ring and party and not a family.
Buy a condom woman, fuck your boyfriends brains out, then figure out how you feel about him and quit leading him on.